As kids we are taught that if we take the blame for something we did wrong, we get in trouble. I know I always say to my kids if you tell the truth you will get in less trouble. But the reality is we don't want to get in trouble at all period.
This is no different as a adult. For this reason we find it very difficult to take the responsibility for our actions, our lives, and our mistakes/lessons.
It seems so easy to notice when others aren't doing it right but when it comes to ourselves well let's face it, things have not changed and that not me kid that drove your parents crazy still lives with you. Little bastard still creates havoc in your life, and no matter how hard you try you just cannot get right of him.
Did you catch the sarcasm here?!?!? It is easy to notice when someone else is in the wrong but when do you take the time to notice you are? Instead of blaming situations, exes, family, everyone or anything else you can, it is time to look in the mirror.
Like I said we have been taught that this will get you into trouble but the truth is, being accountable and accepting what you have done wrong or right actually just means you are human. If we don't learn to accept and learn where we played a role in what went wrong, or what goes wrong then nothing can change. If it isn't because of us then we continue to do the same things, hoping for a different result.
So here is the deal we are not 5 anymore, and the only person our choices really effect for the rest of our lives is us. It is your life and if it is not going the way you want, it is you not allowing it. It is you not changing it and it is you not taking accountability for your actions.
What do I mean?
Yes I am a former abused wife and yes he was brutal. But I knew that and I still got married. (Hello DUH!) and worse than that I knew it and still pushed his buttons. So yes he beat me, but I also pushed him. I also felt that is what I deserved or I would have never allowed it to happen. So poor me doesn't work. Dumb ass seems an appropriate fit, Don't you think?!?!?!?
You have to treat yourself the way you want everyone else to treat you and you have to treat everyone else the way you want to be treated. You are the front line my lovelies, so if you can't see where you screwed up or what you did that you could have done differently then no one else is going to see they should treat you better either.
I am a far freer happier person knowing that I am not perfect. No one is, and the more I realize where I am needing some work the easier it is to work on. So it is your life dammit, stop blaming everything including the weather for why it isn't the way you want it. You will be happy that you did.
Love hugs, and the slap that was needed
Kjarlune Rae
